Friday 28 September 2007

I wanna rise up..

...over Mulholland.

On occasion I read the news.com comments, as I think I've mentioned, although I'm really trying to quit.

Much as I am trying to quit reading overly dramatic teenage angst type blogs written by twenty somethings who know everything but have forgotten they're old enough to know better(trouble with that is it doesn't leave very many - on the other hand, that's a good thing - I would rateher read about someone's cat than a tortured sycophantic discussion of right wing politics, or left wing politics for that matter).

The blogs I have come to terms with and tend to stick with the ones with fewer comments.

As for news.com, I propose a solution.



When you go to make a comment a question appears:



Please choose one of the following:

A: I’m making this comment because I know a bloke this happened to therefore this makes me qualified to give my opinion.

B: I’m making this comment because I’m interested in contributing to this debate in a meaningful manner.

C: I’m making this comment just to stir shit up.

D: I’m a moron.



Answering yes to any of these makes the website send your computer a cookie.



Subsequently, the next time you type “your” when you mean “you are” the cookie sends a message to the motherboard, causing the monitor to explode. Shrapnel embeds itself in the part of the brain that controls the fingers, rendering you unable to type.



Because people that comment on news.com news stories have too much time on their hands and need to be stopped, regardless of their motivation, and the mangling of the English language is just the final nail.



On second thought, maybe I’ve had too much coffee today.

2 comments:

Sherd said...

...ingenious plan, dear fellow...

mangoman said...

Is it 'second thought' or second thoughts'? Thoughts is the normal usage but then it is only one thought unless there is more than one second.